June sat against the wall next to the stairs, eyes closed and deep in… nothing, really. Violet curled up in the corner, its bright cyan eyes a spotlight on the dismal bunker they rested in. Little more than the bare minimum made it the opposite of a highlight for either side. It was perfect to hide in.

Perfect to lament in. Why had she jumped in? It was not a hard question to answer, but it still begged for one all the same. One more satisfying, and less damning. Finally, she took off her own motorcycle helmet and set it between her knees.

“I… don’t think so,” she finally said. Had he heard what she said moments before she jumped off the head of freya morningstar ‘s Rayquaza? Fuck, had Freya heard it? “Physically, I’m not gonna die.”

It’d be easier if she did. Death wasn’t the worst thing in the world. Vulnerability ranked a lot higher on June’s list, personally, especially with him.

“I… I was worried for all the people still around, y’know? Especially after… after Sootopolis,” she confessed. In the moment, the desire had been to stop Regice from crushing innocents and Rayquaza from setting a catastrophic storm of some sort onto the route also. “And…”

Why did she say ‘and’? There was no more and to it. Hope he hadn’t heard her declaration and also didn’t fire her on the spot– she had gone directly against an initiative to siege Oldale. That sounded rather anti-Rocket.

---

howard slayte

Physically, June wouldn't die. Yet the admin suspected that she was emotionally wounded, much like everyone else in this ouroboros of an organization. They devoured their own tales to fill the emptiness that resided in their soul, and Howard suspected that nobody in Team Rocket would ever find the fulfillment in such an infinite cycle.

"You don't need to explain. Lives are fragile, and it's easy for them to be crushed underfoot." Slowly but surely, the Rocket Admin rose to his feet. Ice cracked as joints moved, spraying shards of splintered ice as the admin leaned against the wall, breathing heavily. "You would've hated Petalburg just as much. It doesn't matter where you are in this region, June."

He limped towards his helmet. Why had he thrown it? What had frustrated him so much that he had tossed it aside like worthless garbage?

"The only people who lose are the nameless masses when our two sides play their game of gods." As he leaned down to get his helmet, he almost collapsed. Pain shot up his leg. "It's why I'm heading back out there. Can't let my people die."

His breath frosted as he looked at his distorted reflection in the helmet, only to realize that he didn't recognize the person staring back at him.

"Stay here until you recover, then return to Petalburg. I have a retreat to cover. You'll still be paid." Howard took a deep breath as he looked at her. "Same as always."

---

june sleigh

“Oh. Goodie.”

Cover their retreat? Let his people die? There was a strange, hidden hypocrisy to this that sent June up the wall. To cover their retreat required the threat or acting upon action. Said actions were likely violent.

She’d stopped him to save dozens– yet their lives would still be lost. Her identity, precious and unknown, potentially offered to Freya on a silver platter– just for nothing?

“Y’know, I know my paychecks might as well have a body count tied to them in invisible ink,” her head hit the wall softly, to better ground her. “But I’d appreciate it if they didn’t also have a bloody hand print on them.”

Maybe she was reaching, but maybe she wasn’t reaching enough. But she’d rather be comedically wrong than ignorant of the truth. “We both know what’s gonna happen. To save the people you prefer, you’re likely gonna have to kill a few League people. And if you don’t, those who you save will.”

She hadn’t wanted to be directly on the front lines. Let her deliver silly things, fetch dangerous weapons, do the busy work theoretically anyone else could do. Let her get the miserable four hours of sleep she capped out on and try not to feel like a horrible person. Not watch people die or hear screams of agony no matter where she went.

“Besides, you look worse than me,” she opened her eyes. Their mismatched colors met his. Dangerously so. They did not hold the usual bite she so often associated with the man. Yet they held something. “Do both of us a favor and stay here. You have an excuse, I can give an alibi. Neither of us feel any shittier than we already do.”

---

howard slayte

"My alibi is worth less than their lives!"

This excursion had all been for nothing. He had lost to Freya for nothing. June had played her hand for nothing. It had all been for nothing, and it had led them here, to a bunker that nobody but the oldest Rocket operatives knew, to house a Pokémon nobody knew the name of.

Miraidon.

His eye met hers. Damn. She looked worse than when he had first hired her on to shoulder that mountain of debt. Occasionally, he's forced to come to terms with the prospect that hiring this woman as a courier was a mistake, and that Grigori was right and that he was nothing more than a fool playing cards in a counted deck.

"And I don't prefer them. They just have nowhere else to go. Team Rocket is what they have. The League won't take them back now, and you know that to be true. We're just... marching. Waiting for an ending that sets us free." He was going to leave, until he saw something in her eyes that gave him pause. He wanted a reason to stay, and she gave him one."But I don't think that's coming."

She won. His leg hurt. He collapsed next to her.

"This'll be the third time that I let people die, but I think it'll be the first time that it happens because I didn't act." He laughed, before a thought came to mind. "I'm trying really hard to be mad at you."

---

june sleigh

June flinched when he screamed. And tempted as she was to immediately scream back, My. Pyre held her back. Even if Howard was in the weird middle ground of ‘I don’t know what the hell to think’, it was still better than an enemy. And that was the last thing she wanted more of.

“If you want, I can be mad at both of us with the strength of two people,” June said. Easy to hate him, and even easier to hate herself. A relationship, a good one, one that wouldn’t get thrown in jail if caught– all for this. For money. For him. “Since you seem eager.”

Even now, even after all they’ve been through, the island still managed to keep root in her mind. No matter how much white he tried to paint on, the black between them clung to the worthless compromise of grey.

“Seriously, don’t let them make you think it's your fault,” she said in a tired whisper. “It’s out of your hands. League chooses not to be merciful, and Rocket chooses to send their soldiers on suicide missions. If you stay in here, it’s fewer people you hurt because they were gonna get hurt anyway.”

Comedically wrong. Not even remotely provable, either. But… it felt smart. Right. It was a complicated thing, war. If both sides were going to be ruthless, then it was almost more important to not engage at all. Deny them their version of justice.

“You've fucked up plenty, but not everything can be your fault. Try as you might.”

Violet tilted its head at June and simply stared.

---

howard slayte

"It'd be easier if it was. If every evil in the world could be put at my feet, I think the world would be a happier place." That wasn't a hard bar to cross, amusingly. The bar was deep underground. "Maybe Team Rocket and the Pokémon League could put their differences aside of they could find someone they hated more than each other."

The DRK Triad existed, but they were too distant to be of much use. For all the contempt held for them, the otherworldly force may as well have been on the moon. They were too hard to reach and too hard to defeat, only appearing rarely to remind both sides that there was another thread.

Her logic was bad. He wanted to laugh at it, but she'd kick him and it'd hurt like hell.

"But I don't think that'll ever happen. I can't even bring myself to hate you properly, and you can't even bring yourself to do the opposite. People are fucked, June." He let that thought hold in the air for a long moment, before he turned to look at her. Her belt of Pokeballs shined in the faint light. "But I can think of someone with plenty of reason to hate me. More than you, actually."

A thought came into his head.

"Can I see her?" His voice was soft. "Matchstick?"

---

june sleigh

“Good luck,” June sighed. “I think they attacked each other during the meteor thing too. Not that I’d know.”

Too busy with Dad. Wondering if it was even worth huddling in a bunker for a life that wasn’t going anywhere. Having to think if the world would end and if that was even a bad thing. Bigger fish to fry than if the two factions capable of stopping it would set aside their squabbles for even a fraction of a moment.

But she did raise an eyebrow before he finished his thought. And before she could ask, the archeologist once again unearthed history. Her mouth popped, but she pulled the only decorated ball on her sling off. The Hisuian one didn’t count– she hadn’t drawn on it like this one. It only had an ‘M’ and countless scratches.

“Well… your fun– whatever,” she clicked the button. White flashed, a shape emerged, and–

“Woah!” June hastily threw herself in front of Howard. Again. Except this time, the threat was much more personal about it. Matchstick’s beak barely grazed his nose before the physical body of her trainer stopped her. Several loud ‘caws’ filled the small space. Violet rolled its eyes.

“Back girl, back,” she pushed hard. Even her tired bones were enough to get Matchstick back and away from her enemy. Or she loved June enough to listen to her, even if every cell in her avian body wanted to tear him to ribbons. Set him ablaze and hear his death cries. “Not right now, please.”

Something akin to a grumble escaped her beak, but her wings closed. For now. “Alright, cool, you letting your Clawitzer out for a one-on-one brawl, or?”

Violet stared intently at Howard, saddled with a curiously amused gaze. As if it wanted to see what they did. 

---

howard slayte

 

When the bird emerged, Howard had a quick realization.

Wait this bird is going to peck my eye ou-

Before he could finish that thought, June had stopped the Talonflame from turning him into smoking corpse. Another favor that he owed her. After Freya, they were beginning to pile up. It became a lot harder to weigh the value of one after enough time had passed. He didn't even know which way the scale leaned with June.

Frankly, he was getting confused on who owed who more.

"Hey, Matchstick." The admin grimaced as a few squawks were leveled his way. Those were definitely deserved. He was lucky to not be covered in razor-sharp scratches. "Long time no see. I..."

Damn. He had thought of a dozen things to tell this bird back in the dreamscape, when June had told him that the only way to make any of this work was to eke a drop of forgiveness from Matchstick. Yet the bird had every reason to hate him. Worse, Howard suspected that it hadn't forgotten anything from Ameena's little project.

What did he say?

"It wasn't a Clawitzer. Do I look like a Clawitzer guy to you? Arceus." The admin grimaced, his face paling as he spoke. "I hit you with a Golurk's cannon. You're lucky to be alive. I almost killed you. Both of you."

He sounded like he was about to cry.

"I'm sorry, Matchstick."

---

june sleigh

“Oh, my bad. Next time I’ll double-check on the Pokémon that you said nearly killed us,” June rolled her eyes. While they threatened to remain stuck there, Matchsticks were aimed permanently at Howard. His every move, breath, twitch, and word clung to like a drowning man on a plank.

If looks could kill, he would’ve never existed in the first place. Not even his teary eyes and frown could hope to soothe the sheer hatred that radiated from the bird. Almost like the embers it desperately wanted to ignite. A few scattered lackadaisically from its wings, whispers of a promise.

Yet Miraidon did nothing but watch, an amused spectator. Its heart was not as scorched as Matchsticks, nor as cracked as June’s. Who used the excuse of the violent bird to avoid Howard’s eyes. A heart of steel was necessary. Anything less and she might break.

“Stop apologizing to me, damn it,” she said through grey feathers. “What happened to me didn’t matter.”

How many times did she have to say it? It felt sad, at this point, to repeat the same phrase over and over and over again. Yet its truth never diminished no matter how many times it rang out.

“Me being dead in a ditch isn’t the worst thing in the world,” she said again. She finally turned around, and Violet tilted its head. Her steely resolved looked ever shaky, but she tried nonetheless. “Whether it's a Clawitzer, Golurk, fucking Regice, whatever– stop being sorry for me.”

Matchstick finally attacked, but not who Howard thought. June ducked down at the sudden peck, and let go of her Pokemon. “Ah– what the fuck, Matchstick?!”

She hopped away a few steps, and they both received the fury of its gaze. Violet hummed contently. Its pupil was doing well, in a sense.

This was certainly an unexpected result for her. One she’d hopefully learn from.

---

howard slayte

 

The bird had fight. Even worse, it scared Howard. The Rocket Admin had faced down kings of the sky. He had faced down avatars and gods that could turn the world upside down with but a snap of a finger. He had climbed a mountain to seize a giant, and when he had overreached and fell, he had tried again.

Yet this one bird that pecked at both him and June put the fear of Arceus in Howard more than most things. He shimmied next to June in an attempt to hide from the bird's gaze.

It didn't work.

"Matchstick hates me. Damn, I can't blame her. If you had shot me out of the sky, Shirley would be in the same place." Howard sighed, before shaking his head. He didn't know how to approach this bird, besides fighting it. "When we're not in here, I'll let my Golurk out. Maybe she can let off some steam."

Yet Howard suspected that the contempt this bird had for him was undying. The stars could go out and she'd still want him dead. The only thing that Howard could offer to Matchstick was time. Time dulled all wounds. Given enough time, even her cast would be a distant memory.

"But June, I promise you:"

He took a ragged breath. His voice was firm.

"I'm not sorry for you. Well, maybe a little. But every shitty decision you've made, every shitty decision I've made, they've led us here." He gestured at the dank bunker they were hiding in. "If you don't regret it, then I won't either."

He gave her a look.

"Do you?" His eye flicked to the bird. "Does she?"

---

june sleigh

June had been more hurt in this stupid bunker than she had going against a literal god and a construct the size of a skyscraper. Even worse, it was friendly fire. Blood trickled down her scalp, across her forehead, as she shimmied ever so slightly away from Howard. Just a touch. He was lucky, as before, she would’ve been across the bunker in seconds.

“Doubt it’ll help anything,” June muttered. “She’d use it as an excuse to Flare Blitz you or something.”

Besides, Clawitzer were entirely different prey than Golurk. Clawitzer were damn powerful but slow and prone to missing. Golurk were slow too, but they didn’t miss. ‘Fun playdate’ would turn deadly quick, and Golurk would come out on top no matter what.

“Regret implies that I had any other choice,” June said tiredly. Her shitty decisions were just that, but her back was against the wall. Had been for nearly three years. It wasn’t her fault, or it couldn’t be. It’d be pretty fucked if that were the case. “But…”

“Thanks. I guess.”

“Matchstick, I don’t know…” June met her bird’s dangerous stare as if to challenge her. She looked as pissed as all hell. Blood continued to flow, and the Boundless wiped it away with her hand. “I dunno why she got pissed at me. Makes me nearly want to take your side. What did I do?”

“SCREEEEEEEEE!” Matchstick raised her wings once again, and the passive embers doubled their rate of existence. Her trainer could only roll her eyes.

“Sorry, don’t speak bird.” She could guess what the Pokémon was saying, how it wasn’t true. She kept saying her life didn’t matter, or whatever– and it didn’t. That was the point. They were blips on the map at most, and that was a fact. In a way, Violet had made that life impossible. “But I guess I haven’t really asked her for her thoughts on this all.”

---

howard slayte